Every man dreams of being a good hit in bed. And there are many who do not hesitate to brag about it. But do you really know what makes an excellent sexual partner for a man or a woman? ?
All that, it is very good. But concretely, how to know if you're a good shot ? If you bring all the pleasure and intensity that your partner has the right to expect ? here are the 7 elements that make you this exceptional lover.
A good sexual partner knows how to communicate
In every couple, there are always sensitive subjects the story of a past love, for example subjects of discord… However, These topics can also be seen as a good time to give constructive criticism on the pillow. As delicate as it may seem, talking about what makes you feel good or not is the first step in building intimacy, but also to show that you are a dedicated partner. “Knowing how to tell your partner what helps you feel good is something essential, which allows you to really focus on having fun, yours and that of your partner », according to Dr. Lexx Brown-James, couple specialist. If you're not sure how to bring up the topic, Therapist Esther Boykin says asking questions is an easy starting point to open dialogue : “The ability to talk about sex is essential to creating and maintaining good sexual chemistry. Learn to be comfortable and don't hesitate to ask your partner about their tastes and fantasies. N’attendez pas d’être invité à partager les vôtres. Un bon partenaire est celui qui est prêt à préparer le terrain. After all, how can you give pleasure to another if you are not even willing to talk about it ? »
A good fuck is master of his own orgasm
It's not your partner's job to make sure you have climaxed at the end of sex, whether oral or “physical”. In fact, what makes you sexy in bed, it’s this ability to “take charge” of your orgasm, to let your partner know what you need to achieve nirvana. Sexual confidence, knowing your body is an important key, said the Dr again. Brown-James : “Don’t wait for your partner to do all the work to give you pleasure and take charge (finally, way of talking !), it will be better for both of you !“Some guys are sometimes too generous and linger a little too long on cunnilingus for example, yes, it's possible ! This is a bad plan because you then wait to “take action”; but the risk is that, after enjoying, your partner probably won't want to pass 15 minutes trying to make you cum too. Focusing on your own orgasm may seem selfish at first glance, but it’s actually quite the opposite !
A good sexual partner lives in the moment
Even if you are healthy, active and in excellent shape, this is not always the case with your head. More often than it seems, you are elsewhere. What do you think about during foreplay ? Or when you start making love ? Don't you think too much, to the point of no longer even feeling and living the present moment ?
“Our largest sexual organ is our brain ! If your mind wanders, it will be more difficult to enjoy the present sexual act and therefore to be a good guy”, explique le Dr Rachel Needle, licensed clinical psychologist and sex therapist. The next time you feel “elsewhere”, focus on the simplest things she does, just then : the way her face moves when she wakes up, how she wiggles for you, the way her breasts move when she's on top of you... anyway, everything you need to keep your mind exactly where it needs to be, “enjoying every second of sex” !
A good sexual partner is curious and open to change
Think about what excited you about 16 years. Then at 21 years. How was it at 25 years ? Just as you grow in your career and social circle, your wants and needs change too. When you're a good lover, you want to feel constantly connected to the person you are having sex with. To do this, you must be willing to try new things while being aware that your partner's tastes may change too. “The best part of human relationships, and often the most difficult to take into account, is that we are always in a process of evolution”, explains Dr. Boykin. “This evolving nature can be especially fun in your sex life, but only if you keep that curiosity, this openness towards each other. The best lovers know that the best way to have pleasure in bed is through continuous learning and exploration of their partner's body and mind.".
A good sexual partner does not skimp on foreplay
OK, we told you not to linger, but still. If you don't think about it now, you should do this : women NEED foreplay, even more than men. Sex, it's like a marathon : you can do it on a whim but it will still be better if you prepare in advance ! But be careful not to always reproduce the same kisses, caresses, spankings or other. Foreplay doesn't have to be some kind of naughty routine, step by step. A “good guy” knows that foreplay takes the form of anything that is likely to increase desire in his or her partner. « Sexy messages, a naughty photo, an erotic massage or even a little help with household chores : anything that allows your partner to leave their daily routine and think about their future pleasure can be seen as foreplay”. The key to foreplay, it’s really about making sure your partner is happy (-I know). Because by being happy, she will not only be able to let go better but will fully enjoy your intimate relationships.
A good shot has confidence in himself
Having self-confidence does not necessarily mean taking care of everything, all the time. On the contrary, it is a quality that allows you to be flexible and do (or precisely not to do) whatever you like. By having this confidence in yourself when you kiss your partner or when you make love to them, you will give him or her the impression that he or she is going to live an unforgettable experience. An impression that often becomes a reality and will make you the best lover of his life !
A good sexual partner likes to have fun
At the end of the day, the purpose of sex, it's about having fun, non? Nobody likes sex because it is an obligation or a constraint and if that is the case, then we advise you to quickly remedy this problem !
Source : masculin.com